What’s holding you back?

Do you worry about people judging you? If you’re anything like most people in the world, you probably do. I know I do (though I thankfully worry about it A LOT less than I used to!)

Judgment is a theme that has come up a couple times this past week so let’s talk about it….

Are you letting other people hold you back cause you’re scared of what they’ll think?  

  • Did you not participate in Self Tape May cause you didn’t want people to watch your work?  
  • Have you stopped yourself from posting your work publicly because you’re nervous about what ppl from HS or even your parents or peers will think of you? 

I get it. I’ve held myself back like that before too. 

And of course we don’t want to put BAD work out there, but you have to start somewhere and if you never put anything out there, then are you ever going to get anywhere? 

I have a client who recently booked a major guest star on a long running tv show and people on the internet came AFTER HER cause of who her mom is. They said it was nepotism and that the person’s mom probably bought them the part. NEWS FLASH – this person doesn’t even speak to their mom. Casting had NO IDEA who their mom was and they auditioned and booked the role just like anyone else. But of course these little internet trolls didn’t know any of this and they made it their mission to attack. And let me tell you, it really hurt my client’s feelings – rightfully so! It sucks when people say mean things about you, especially when they don’t know you, but being in this industry, it happens sometimes. 

You have to remember, you are being bold and brave and courageous putting yourself out there as an actor. Whether that’s the work you do in a booking – trusting the editor is going to cut together something solid and that the director is making good choices or whether it’s posting a self tape on your instagram, a sketch on tiktok or uploading your take on Actors Access. 

Yes, with almost any good opportunity in life there’s a bit of risk when you put yourself out there, but that’s the only way we move forward. It’s the only way we grow. 

We cannot live our lives to protect ourselves from these little trolls out there (and yes, that includes that bitchy girl from your HS). The sooner we can accept that if you want to work all the time, people are going to know you, and the reality is, some people are not going to like you. Some people may even hate you. But of course it’s not really YOU they are hating, it’s their idea of you. Still, it can hurt. 

Trust me, I know from experience. Just because I have this newsletter and within our small community of actors I put myself out there, some people don’t like me for that. Yup, I’ve gotten hate mail too. 

Do I let that stop me from living my life? From sending this newsletter?  No. Is it scary and anxiety inducing sometimes? Hell yes it is. There are nights I can’t sleep cause I wonder, “Did I go too far this time? Was I too vulnerable? Are ppl sick of hearing about my dead mom and new baby?” Maybe, but whatever! I share cause I WANT TO DO IT FOR ME and cause some of you find value in it. I can’t let a few bad apples ruin it for everyone else, let alone ruin it for MYSELF. 

And remember what your parents probably told you? That person often doesn’t like you cause they’re jealous. Sure, not all the time, but if someone is really judging the crap out of the self tape you posted as they sit behind their desk…they are likely jealous they didn’t pursue this career, or jealous they didn’t study where you did, or look the way you do, or have the balls to be brave enough to share their work.

So, I say, fuck it, share it! 

Of course make sure you are personally proud of your work, but don’t hold yourself back cause you’re worried what the trolls are thinking. They should just stay under the bridge and leave the rest of us alone.  

OK, end rant. Have a fabulous week. Yay summer!!!

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